Work is hard. They think I'm a lot smarter than I actually am. It's scary writing things that will go to national agencies... about things that I have just learned about through some last-minute research... I'm glad at least THEY have confidence in me, even if it is a little misplaced, because I don't.
I have been trying to figure out a happy hour tonight with some people, and I received this sentence in a reply email: "Your emails are hilarious; it is basically your entire train of thought." I guess I do tend to ramble. Case in point: this site.
I slept 12 hours last night. I haven't slept that much since I was uber-sick in college and my parents even had to drive in from Ohio to take care of me for a few days. I started sleeping around 5:30 after I got home from work (thought: I think I'll just take a small nap, then get up and unpack some of my computer stuff) and aside from a 1-minute phone call from the boy around 7:30, I slept until my alarm went off this morning at 6. Unreal. But, I feel a lot better and now hopefully I'll be totally recharged for tonight and the weekend. As long as the cold that Grace gave me does away! (bitch.)
On another note, I was just in the elevator and saw this guy that my coworkers and I have seen before. He's old (has white hair) and wears suits, and has a buzz cut except for this REALLY long braided rat tail that goes halfway down his back. And he carries around a poodle with him. All of the time. Strangest MFer I've ever seen in this area.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Crash and Burn
Before I talk about my night and whatnot, I have a question- for all of you that use the metro to commute to work... don't you feel sorry for the Examiner guy? There's the loud and friendly Express guy that is handing out free papers left and right, and then the poor Examiner is just standing there with a pathetic look on his face because no one wants his crappy paper. But, that Express guy by Cleveland Park is almost as cool as the guy who plays trumpet outside of Union Station, between it and the Capitol- both make my morning just a little bit nicer. Poor old Examiner dude. Maybe I'll get your paper tomorrow... but probably not.
Well, my friends said that it was coming, and sure enough, last night, it did. I crashed. After being slightly more and more delirious each day with little sleep, I almost fell asleep around 1pm yesterday at my desk. I got a second wind after work, but then just about passed out again during my Arabic tutorial. I then sat on a couch at the boy's place (he asked me if I had a nickname in my blog for him yet, and I said no... I sitll can't come up with one, so I'll just call him "the boy" until I think of something good) for about an hour-ish and was pretty languid... all conversation/personality was just stripped from me. Not because I wanted to be quiet. I had things to say, none of which were really important, but still. I just couldn't physically form the words, I was so tired. That, and I wasn't feeling too great, either. It's regrettable because he'll be out of town until next week, but things happen, I guess. Doesn't make me feel any better about it... I should have taken more advantage of the time, even if I felt awful. But, I'm somewhat recharged after sleeping last night. I'm skipping football practice tonight to sleep, too... I'm totally rambling on, but at least I'm not absolutely delirious like I have been at work the past few days and at the hockey game. My coworkers were looking at me as if I was on something serious.
I was having a few problems with a work assignment yesterday (I was given an assignment with no clear direction) and after being told it was wrong but was given no other feedback, I voiced my concerns... just to hear "Hahahaha, well, there's a pretty big learning curve here, huh?" and then the boss walked out of the room. Whaaaa? What did I get myself into? But, on that note, I am off to donate some money upstairs so that I can wear jeans tomorrow (yay!) and finally get to work. Sorry my life is so boring right now.
Well, my friends said that it was coming, and sure enough, last night, it did. I crashed. After being slightly more and more delirious each day with little sleep, I almost fell asleep around 1pm yesterday at my desk. I got a second wind after work, but then just about passed out again during my Arabic tutorial. I then sat on a couch at the boy's place (he asked me if I had a nickname in my blog for him yet, and I said no... I sitll can't come up with one, so I'll just call him "the boy" until I think of something good) for about an hour-ish and was pretty languid... all conversation/personality was just stripped from me. Not because I wanted to be quiet. I had things to say, none of which were really important, but still. I just couldn't physically form the words, I was so tired. That, and I wasn't feeling too great, either. It's regrettable because he'll be out of town until next week, but things happen, I guess. Doesn't make me feel any better about it... I should have taken more advantage of the time, even if I felt awful. But, I'm somewhat recharged after sleeping last night. I'm skipping football practice tonight to sleep, too... I'm totally rambling on, but at least I'm not absolutely delirious like I have been at work the past few days and at the hockey game. My coworkers were looking at me as if I was on something serious.
I was having a few problems with a work assignment yesterday (I was given an assignment with no clear direction) and after being told it was wrong but was given no other feedback, I voiced my concerns... just to hear "Hahahaha, well, there's a pretty big learning curve here, huh?" and then the boss walked out of the room. Whaaaa? What did I get myself into? But, on that note, I am off to donate some money upstairs so that I can wear jeans tomorrow (yay!) and finally get to work. Sorry my life is so boring right now.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Silly Canadians and their sports...
So, I went to the Caps/Pens game last night. And I saw 2 midgets. Not even at the same time- one at the Chinatown metro stop and another one when I was walking past Magruder's on my way home. I don't think I've ever seen one in my life, and I saw 2 yesterday. Strange. The game was good though- 3 fights, Pens won. Plus we all grabbed free hotdogs when we left the stadium. Mmmmmm.
I got an email from someone today that made me feel... sad. It was from someone named Cracker who I haven't treated very well since the day I first met him, but he still bends over backwards to do things for me and be nice to me. I don't know what it is about him, but something just irks me after spending all of 10 minutes with the guy. I don't feel that I'm a bad person, but he somehow just brings out the worst in me. Is it because he just gives me whatever I want and/or need and I feel that he's a pushover? That he tends to my wishes and I find that overbearing? I don't know. But this is an excerpt of the (long) email that I received this morning:
"I’m driving home form work on Monday evening, and the sun is setting just over the hills in front of me. Monday was a very long day, but let’s not get into that. Anyway this sunset was really a rather outstanding scene, and then to top all that off, they start playing the new Mumra single on the radio. I think it’s a cover of a Smiths song, but don’t quote me on that. I couldn’t help feeling all warm and fuzzy on the inside thinking about this crazy American girl I used to know."
That's because I went to see The Automatic with him and Mumra opened. Sigh. Okay, confession: he gave me a tv once and I just stopped talking to him about a week later by avoiding phone calls and visits. Kept the tv. Isn't that awful?? A year later, he decided to email me to see how I was, and since it wasn't like we ever dated or anything, I just thought it was nice that an old "friend" could forgive the way I behaved just to see how I was doing. Things were fine over intermittent emails, but when I went to visit his area (and he took the whole week off of work) my behavior went back to being horrible. That's one of the biggest regrets I have... but I can't help myself. He is the only person in the world that just irritates me so much that I have to act that way, but I keep trying and keep emailing because I want that to change. And it doesn't. And I don't know what's wrong with me... I'm not a bad person, I swear!!! Maybe it's true, that girls like assholes better. I mean, that isn't true about who I'm with now (who is one of the nicest people I've ever met before in my life), but maybe if Cracker stopped sending me nice emails and mailing me lemon Polos and sending me cards for the hell of it, would I feel any different? Maybe I'd be nicer because I wouldn't feel smothered by someone who is just trying to be a good friend? Which brings up another thought- he's doing the same things that I tend to do for people... am I an overbearing friend? Do people hate me for the same reasons???
I got an email from someone today that made me feel... sad. It was from someone named Cracker who I haven't treated very well since the day I first met him, but he still bends over backwards to do things for me and be nice to me. I don't know what it is about him, but something just irks me after spending all of 10 minutes with the guy. I don't feel that I'm a bad person, but he somehow just brings out the worst in me. Is it because he just gives me whatever I want and/or need and I feel that he's a pushover? That he tends to my wishes and I find that overbearing? I don't know. But this is an excerpt of the (long) email that I received this morning:
"I’m driving home form work on Monday evening, and the sun is setting just over the hills in front of me. Monday was a very long day, but let’s not get into that. Anyway this sunset was really a rather outstanding scene, and then to top all that off, they start playing the new Mumra single on the radio. I think it’s a cover of a Smiths song, but don’t quote me on that. I couldn’t help feeling all warm and fuzzy on the inside thinking about this crazy American girl I used to know."
That's because I went to see The Automatic with him and Mumra opened. Sigh. Okay, confession: he gave me a tv once and I just stopped talking to him about a week later by avoiding phone calls and visits. Kept the tv. Isn't that awful?? A year later, he decided to email me to see how I was, and since it wasn't like we ever dated or anything, I just thought it was nice that an old "friend" could forgive the way I behaved just to see how I was doing. Things were fine over intermittent emails, but when I went to visit his area (and he took the whole week off of work) my behavior went back to being horrible. That's one of the biggest regrets I have... but I can't help myself. He is the only person in the world that just irritates me so much that I have to act that way, but I keep trying and keep emailing because I want that to change. And it doesn't. And I don't know what's wrong with me... I'm not a bad person, I swear!!! Maybe it's true, that girls like assholes better. I mean, that isn't true about who I'm with now (who is one of the nicest people I've ever met before in my life), but maybe if Cracker stopped sending me nice emails and mailing me lemon Polos and sending me cards for the hell of it, would I feel any different? Maybe I'd be nicer because I wouldn't feel smothered by someone who is just trying to be a good friend? Which brings up another thought- he's doing the same things that I tend to do for people... am I an overbearing friend? Do people hate me for the same reasons???
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
They all come back
Is it something in the air? Is my happiness giving off a signal that makes people from my past want to be a part of it? In the past 5 days, I have been contacted by Two Cents (my last boyfriend), Cale (my college live-in boyfriend), Brill (a guy I dated just before leaving Belfast) and Major (a guy who- get this- wanted to date me last Spring, even though he had a 12-year-old daughter and still lived with his ex-wife). Two Cents, Cale and Brill just wanted to see how I was doing, as they were recently thinking about me for some reason, and Major wants to buy me a drink before he is shipped off to Iraq. Which makes me want to give in and say okay, but that would just be weird... How did I meet this winner? Well.
Last summer was deemed the Summer I Got My Groove Back, according to Dagger. I was at Murphy's one night with Dagger and Minnie when I started talking to a crazy girl from the Naval Academy and her Marine friend. Before I knew it, I was sitting at a table full of Marines and having a great time. The girl from the Naval Academy and I hung out a good deal during the next month. We went to Sine's one time in Pentagon City, and when I returned from a trip to the bathroom, she had seated herself at a table full of Air Force pilots, who were dressed in their flight suits, by the way. One guy asked me if I had ever been on a motorcycle, and when I said no, he took me for a spin around the parking lot. He asked if I'd like to go on a ride sometime, and I figured that could be fun, so I said yes. I didn't realize that the ride would mean a 2-mile ride to Old Town for lunch. What is it with old men taking me to lunch/dinner when I don't realize that's their intention??? Well he has been texting me ever since, even though I told him I didn't care to hang out with him anymore- it was just too weird. But, that being said, I feel bad for not grabbing a pint with him before he heads off to Iraq. Oh well.
Some people need to realize that others cut ties with them for a reason. If something ends in such a fucked-up way and then you don't speak for awhile, just leave it. You have your own life, and I'm slowly but surely (actually, not that slowly, come to think about it) building a new and happy life for myself. The last thing I need is to get sidetracked by wondering why you're contacting me, how I should politely decline a pint, or why you think I would want to talk to you after you hurt me in many different ways. I don't care that much anymore, but I still don't really want to be reminded of it... you know? I have more important things to think about... like how I'm going to get everything unpacked.
But, here's just a bit of an email I received from Brill that I think is hilarious... "Hope you will be back on the little isle at some point and we can meet up and get subtly drunk on wonderous ales." Not much chance of that happening. Meeting up with him, I mean, not drinking in Belfast.
Last summer was deemed the Summer I Got My Groove Back, according to Dagger. I was at Murphy's one night with Dagger and Minnie when I started talking to a crazy girl from the Naval Academy and her Marine friend. Before I knew it, I was sitting at a table full of Marines and having a great time. The girl from the Naval Academy and I hung out a good deal during the next month. We went to Sine's one time in Pentagon City, and when I returned from a trip to the bathroom, she had seated herself at a table full of Air Force pilots, who were dressed in their flight suits, by the way. One guy asked me if I had ever been on a motorcycle, and when I said no, he took me for a spin around the parking lot. He asked if I'd like to go on a ride sometime, and I figured that could be fun, so I said yes. I didn't realize that the ride would mean a 2-mile ride to Old Town for lunch. What is it with old men taking me to lunch/dinner when I don't realize that's their intention??? Well he has been texting me ever since, even though I told him I didn't care to hang out with him anymore- it was just too weird. But, that being said, I feel bad for not grabbing a pint with him before he heads off to Iraq. Oh well.
Some people need to realize that others cut ties with them for a reason. If something ends in such a fucked-up way and then you don't speak for awhile, just leave it. You have your own life, and I'm slowly but surely (actually, not that slowly, come to think about it) building a new and happy life for myself. The last thing I need is to get sidetracked by wondering why you're contacting me, how I should politely decline a pint, or why you think I would want to talk to you after you hurt me in many different ways. I don't care that much anymore, but I still don't really want to be reminded of it... you know? I have more important things to think about... like how I'm going to get everything unpacked.
But, here's just a bit of an email I received from Brill that I think is hilarious... "Hope you will be back on the little isle at some point and we can meet up and get subtly drunk on wonderous ales." Not much chance of that happening. Meeting up with him, I mean, not drinking in Belfast.
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